I hide my feelings as people hide gold

a poem by R.A. Jacob

I hide my feelings as people hide gold

I bury my disappointment too deep,

Yet my buried disappointments,

From myself, I cannot conceive.

I know the place where I stand,

I know my wounds do stink,

Yet to the world a smile,

Yet to the world, I am pink.

I wear my smile as I wear my tie,

As I undress, I am just the same,

Smile millennium  away from me,

Sorrow my perpetual domain.

You stand as an edifice of my sorrow,

The stone that crushed my heart,

I need no sympathy from inanimate,

Stones are meant to be hard.

It was a blunder that I loved you,

I expecting blood out of stone,

See my hope is shattered,

My heart in pieces is blown.

Don't it show me the sea,

When does it is my life,

Don't show me the water,

See my tongue is dry.

In my life water is fiction,

Found in dreams nowhere on earth,

Thirsty tongue for a droplet,

Red hot my heart as a hearth.

Note - Written in 1997